"Miles? I'm off to the gym now. When you get up, could please empty the dehumidifier and make the bed?" He grunted, and shooed me away. Though the conversation on his end all but screamed lucidity, I decided to call him on my walk back from the gym to inquire, "Have you been up long? Have you emptied the dehumidifier? Made the bed?"

He sounded woozy at best. "Uh..." A silence ensued, a silence wherein he undoubtedly wondered why he was dreaming of his wife nagging him...he gets enough of that in real life, after all. Finally, he continued, with a stammer, "Uh huh."

"Both the dehumidifier and the bed?"

Further ponderous silence caught my attention before a stronger, more wakeful voice asserted, "Yes!" I could smell the BS from a mile away.

"Are they really done, or are you just going to do them quickly before I make it back home?" I know how the boy's mind works, disturbing as it is.

"Well, I guess you'll just never know. Hey? I gotta go now though, ok? See you soon!"